Yoko Broke Up The Band

The official boardgame of the Jux Entente.

Yoko Broke up the Band is a boardgame based on the Jux Entente theme. Readers closely following our forum know that we are currently expanding the Jux Core membership, which means that this will likely be the very last thing ever released in the old Jux mythology framework. But it’s a big feature, and funnily enough, it concerns the breakup of Jux itself.

The premise for the game is as follows: Instead of Kitty Vertigo splitting off from Jux, the reality of Yoko assumes that the Jux Entente actually broke up. The result is that myself, ZenZagg and Kitty Vertigo (notice the deliberate uses of aliases as opposed to our real names) begin to squabble and fight amongst ourselves over things like who gets to keep the Jux Entente domain and whatnot. These are abstracted in the game by the general term “assets.” The winner of this game is thus whichever former Jux Entente member ends up in control of the majority of the former communal assets.

This version of Yoko is what I would call beta. It’s not been extensively playtested yet, and will likely change when and if it ever is. Any changes will be posted in a new feature. I’ve left it expandable, so that I can add our new core member BBQ Frito as a member if it comes to that.

Rules

  • This is a game for 3 players.
  • The first player to 30 assets wins.
  • Every player starts with 10 assets.
  • No player can ever have negative assets.
  • This game is played with a 12-sided die called the location die.
  • To begin, roll a 12-sided die to see who goes first.
  • At the start of their turn the current player gains two assets and rolls the location die. The player then moves his piece to the location on the board that corresponds with that number and draws the type of card associated with it. Any other players already present on that location also draw cards.

    • If a deck runs out of cards, reshuffle any discarded, non-unique cards of that type together to replenish the deck. Unique cards are removed from play when used.
    • A location can have additional benefits or detriments beyond drawing cards.

  • The active player plays any cards he is able and willing to use, to a maximum of 3 actions per turn. Played cards are discarded if they have no lasting effect. If a card has a lasting effect, it is placed in front of the player using it. Unique cards are removed from play when used rather than discarded.

    • A new card cannot be played until all actions of the previously played card are resolved, not including lasting effects.

  • After cards have been played, if anyone has 30 assets, that player is now the winner. If no one has 30 assets, the active player’s turn is over and the player seated to his left is now the active player.

    • A winner is only declared after all cards have been played in a turn. If a player reaches 30 assets at any other stage of a turn, but does not have 30 assets after all cards are played, that player does not win .

Card Types

  • Social Manipulation

    • Greater asset drains on others but lower asset incomes. Expensive and risky “shields.”

  • Technical Asshattery

    • Moderate asset drains on others with excellent asset incomes. “Shutdown” powers.

  • Passive Lurkery

    • Low asset drains and incomes, but constant “leeching” powers.

  • Mortal Combat

    • Risky manuevers that can result in huge asset and card drains, losing turns, and other consequences.
    • Mortal Combat cards are only playable when the player using the card and the player or players targeted are in the same location space on the board.

Playable Characters

  • Crossed Reality

    • CR pays two fewer assets to play Social Manipulation cards, to a minimum cost of 0.

  • Kitty Vertigo

    • KV pays two fewer assets to play Technical Asshattery cards, to a minimum cost of 0.

  • ZenZagg

    • ZZ pays one fewer asset to play Passive Lurkery cards, to a minimum cost of 0.
    • ZZ pays one fewer asset to play Technical Asshattery cards, to a minimum cost of 0.

Cards

  • Social Manipulation

    1. Slick Tongued (2x)

      • Gain two assets.

    2. Not Afraid to Speak Your Mind

      • Gain one asset. All other players must immediately play a card with no asset cost that gives them at least one asset, but that doesn’t target any other player. If a player has no cards of this type, he must discard a card of his choosing from his hand.

    3. Distinct Lack of Awkwardness

      • Gain one asset. If you are in a location that gives Social Manipulation cards, immediately draw a Social Manipulation card.

    4. Temporarily Disarming Charm

      • Play during another player’s turn immediately after a Mortal Combat card is played against you. You gain one asset and the Mortal Combat is canceled. The Mortal Combat card returns to its player’s hand and that player regains any assets spent to play the card. The Mortal Combat card may be played again this turn against another player.

    5. Outthink, Outspeak, Win

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Target player loses four assets.

    6. Contradictory Statements

      • This card costs three assets.
      • Target player loses six assets.

    7. Summon a Returning Lover

      • Unique.
      • This card costs five assets.
      • If target player is using any persistent card with “girlfriend” in the title, that card is discarded immediately and that player loses half their assets, or 12 assets, whichever is greater. Otherwise, that player loses six assets.

    8. More Money, More Education

      • This card costs six assets.
      • Roll a 12-sided die. Take that many assets from each other player.

    9. Tactical Verbal Retreat

      • This card costs four assets.
      • Each other player loses four assets.

    10. Screw You Guys, I’m Going Home

      • Unique
      • Persistent
      • This card costs two assets to put into play.
      • Whenever a card played by another player would take assets from you, divide the amount of assets that would be taken by 4. The new value is the amount of assets you lose, to a minimum of 1. At the start of your turn, you lose four assets; if you cannot pay this amount, this card is discarded.

    11. Live-In Girlfriend (2x)

      • Persistent
      • This card costs half of your assets to put into play.
      • Instead of the two assets you would normally gain at the beginning of your turn divide the total of your current assets by two. You gain that many assets.
      • At the beginning of each other player’s turn, you lose two assets.
      • At any point during your turn you can discard this card by paying half of your current assets.

    12. Retreat to Academia

      • Persistent
      • This card costs three assets to put into play.
      • While this card is in play, you cannot be targeted by any Mortal Combat cards and the cost of Technical Asshattery cards played against you doubles.
      • You do not gain two assets at the start of your turn whi
        le this card is in play.

      • At the beginning of your turn you may discard this card, but you cannot take any other actions during that turn.

    13. Financial Management

      • Persistent
      • This card costs four assets to put into play.
      • While this card is in play, you can choose to play no cards and skip your turn. If you do this, you gain 8 assets rather than the normal 2 for that turn.
      • Any other player may choose to pay 10 assets during his turn to place this card under his control. All effects of this card now apply to the new controlling player.
      • Any player may force the controlling player to discard this card by skipping his turn.

    14. My Credit Card is Bigger

      • This must be the first card you play during your turn.
      • You cannot play any Passive Lurkery cards for the rest of the turn.
      • Gain four assets.

    15. Quick Compromise (2x)

      • Choose one other player. You gain five assets, the target player gains six.
      • The player not targeted loses two assets.

    16. Quick Thinking

      • This card costs three assets.
      • Roll a 12 sided die, and divide the result by two, rounding up. Take that many assets from each other player.

    17. Staged Crisis

      • You gain 8 assets.
      • Every other player gains 4 assets.

  • Technical Asshattery

    1. Sell Your Mind (2x)

      • Gain two assets.

    2. Hard Reboot

      • This must be the first card you play during your turn.
      • Gain three assets.
      • Your Technical Asshattery cards cost double this turn.

    3. Firewalled and Logged

      • Play at the end of another player’s turn.
      • You gain two assets for each Technical Asshattery card that player used during his turn, regardless of target.

    4. Switched to Gtalk Jabber

      • This must be the first card you play during your turn.
      • Gain four assets.
      • You cannot play any Social Manipulation cards this turn.
      • Your Passive Lurkery cards cost double this turn.

    5. Simple Backdoor

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Target player loses three assets.

    6. All the King’s Men and Trojan Horses

      • This card costs three assets.
      • Target player loses five assets.

    7. Evidence for the Police

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Choose a player with a persistent Technical Asshattery card targeted against you. That player must pay six assets or discard all persistent Technical Asshattery cards they have in play.

    8. Moore’s Law: Keep up with the Joneses (2x)

      • Put any number of your asset tokens in your right hand, and hide the remainder in your left. The other players must do the same. When everyone is ready, open your right hands. If another player has fewer tokens in their right hand than you, they lose two asset tokens for each token they have less than your total. If another player has more tokens in their right hand than you, they lose one asset token for each token they have over your total. If another player is exactly right, they gain asset tokens equal to the number in their hand.
      • Discard the tokens in your right hand.

    9. Friends Only (2x)

      • Persistent
      • When this card comes into play choose another player. During your turn at any point you can pay two assets to prevent that player from using any Passive Lurkery cards against you, including persistent effects, during their next turn.
      • Any player can discard two Technical Asshattery cards to force the owner to discard this card.

    10. Blocked! (2x)

      • Persistent
      • When this card comes into play choose another player. Durning your turn at any point you can pay two assets to prevent that player from using any Social Manipulation cards against you, including persistent effects, during their next turn.
      • Any player can discard two Technical Asshattery cards to force the owner to discard this card.

    11. Close the Ports

      • Persistent
      • When this card comes into play choose another player. During your your turn at any point you can pay two assets to prevent that player from using any Technical Asshattery cards against you, including persistent effects, during they next turn.
      • Any player can discard two Technical Asshattery cards to force the owner to discard this card.

    12. Changed Email and AIM

      • This card must be the first card you play during your turn.
      • Gain six assets.
      • You can only play Technical Asshattery cards this turn.

    13. Hack the Gibson

      • This card costs six assets.
      • Choose a target player. You may take any or all of the cards in that player’s hand.

    14. AMD Athlon128X8 Extremely Expensive Awesome Edition

      • Unique
      • This card costs four assets.
      • For the remainder of this turn you may play as many Technical Asshattery cards as you wish. If the card says “This card must be the first card you play during your turn,” disregard that text.
      • You may discard any Social Manipulation, Passive Lurkery, or Mortal Combat cards that you wish. For each card you discard, draw a Technical Asshattery card.

    15. Almost a Porn Site

      • Unique
      • Gain six assets.
      • Target player cannot play any cards during their next turn other than Mortal Combat cards.

    16. WoW: It’s an Addiction

      • You lose two assets. This is not a cost, and is not affected by any cost modifiers.
      • Every other player loses four assets.

  • Passive Lurkery

    1. Keep your Head Down (2x)

      • Gain two assets.

    2. I Read your Journal

      • Gain one asset.
      • You may choose a player. That player may immediately play a Technical Asshattery card against you. Gain three assets.

    3. Secret Myspace Account

      • Gain one asset.
      • This card does not count towards your three-card playing total for this turn.

    4. Really Simple Password

      • Gain one asset.
      • Choose a player. Pick a card at random from that player’s hand without looking. The player cannot use that card during his next turn.

    5. Aggressive Anonymous Comment

      • This card costs three assets.
      • Target player loses four assets.

    6. Snide Instant Message

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Target player loses one asset. During that player’s next turn, his Social Manipulation costs are doubled and his Mortal Combat costs are halved.

    7. Subtle Redirection (2x)

      • This card costs four assets.
      • Choose a player. That player cannot use any cards against you during his next turn.
      • The choosen player can ignore this effect by paying you six assets as soon as this card is played.

    8. Forgot to Change the Database Password

      • Unique
      • This card costs eight assets.
      • Look at the other players’ hands. You may choose to immediately play up to two cards from each player’s hand. If you play a card from another player’s hand, they pay half the cost and you pay the other half. This does not affect the number of cards you can play this turn.
      • Any player can immediately give you t
        en assets to prevent you from seeing his hand.

    9. Google: Blackmail Made Simple (2x)

      • Persistent
      • When this card comes into play choose a player. That player must pay you one asset for every card he plays.
      • Any player can pay six assets to force the owner to discard this card.

    10. Hardcore Email Reading (2x)

      • Persistent
      • When this card comes into play choose a player and a card type. That player must pay you two assets for every card of that type he plays.
      • Any player can pay eight assets to force the owner to discard this card.

    11. You Have a Cordless Phone; I Have a Frequency Scanner

      • Unique
      • Persistent
      • This card costs four assets.
      • When this card comes into play choose a player. As long as this card is in play, the cost of any card that player plays is paid directly to you instead of discarded.
      • The targeted player can pay 10 assets to force the owner to discard this card. Any other player can pay 5 assets to force the owner to discard this card.

    12. I Know Where You Slept Last Night

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Target player must give two assets to each other player.

    13. Saved Notes of a Forgotten Time

      • This card costs three assets.
      • Play at the end of another player’s turn. You gain assets equal to the combined costs of all the cards that player used during his turn.

    14. Moderate Discovery

      • This card costs one asset.
      • Every other player loses two assets.

    15. We Were Friends Once

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Any player using a card that targets a specific player (rather than all players, or all other players) before your next turn must pay twice the listed cost.

    16. Hidden RSS Feed

      • If you have less than 15 assets, you gain four assets.
      • If you have more than 15 assets, this card costs two assets.
      • You may look at the other player’s hands, but you cannot say anything about the cards you see there.

  • Mortal Combat

    1. Just a Little Fist Fight (4x)

      • This card costs one asset.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. You and your opponent must roll a 12-sided die; whoever rolls highest gains three assets. The loser must discard a card from their hand. No action is taken in a tie.

    2. Wiffle Bat Challenge (4x)

      • This card costs two assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. Each of you must discard a card face down. Flip the cards over; the player who played a card with the highest cost wins and gains five assets. No action is taken in a tie. All cards used in the contest are discarded.

    3. Shouting Match (2x)

      • This card costs one asset.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. You and your opponent must roll a 12-sided die; whoever rolls the closest to number six gains two assets; the other player loses one asset. No action is taken in a tie.

    4. He Knew the Game of Fisticuffs (2x)

      • This card costs four assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. You and your opponent must roll a 12-sided die; whoever rolls the highest gains five assets. The loser must discard a card from their hand. no action is taken in a tie.
      • After the contest is decided, the loser may pay two assets to cause another round of combat, identical to the above. The winner may pay three assets to continue. This can be done until neither player wants to continue.

    5. Surprise Kick to the Head (2x)

      • This card costs four assets.
      • This must be the first card played in your turn. You cannot play any other cards after this one.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. Roll a 12-sided die. Your opponent loses that many assets.
      • Your opponent must roll a 12-sided die. You lose assets equal to half the amount shown on the die, rounded up; if your opponent roles a 12, you lose the full amount shown on the die.

    6. OMG WTF BBQ

      • This card costs six assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. You and your opponent both lay your hands face up on the table and add up the costs of the cards; whoever has the lowest cost value wins. The winner gets to choose a hand from the cards on the table equal to the number of cards he entered the contest with, as well as six assets. All other cards are discarded. In a tie, all cards are discarded.

    7. From Somewhere, a Zip Gun (2x)

      • This card costs eight assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. The player you did not choose must roll a 12-sided die; the number shown is the target number. You and your opponent must then take turns rolling a 12-sided die; you go first. The first player to roll the target number wins and gains eight assets. The loser must skip his next turn completely.

    8. Full-Fledged Luau (2x)

      • This card costs eight assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. You and your opponent both roll a 12-sided die. The player rolling the lowest is the winner and gains 8 assets. The loser must stay in this location for the next two turns. The loser rolls the die as normal, but does not recieve any cards unless he rolls the number of the location he is on, and does not move.

    9. I Know Some Karate

      • This card costs six assets.
      • Pick a player in the same location as you. That player rolls a 12-sided die. The number shown on the die is the amount of assets he loses and you gain. That player may choose to roll the die a second time and disregard the first number. However, if he does this the second number must be accepted; he cannot go back to the first number.

Example Board

1

Glen Rock, Pennsylvania

TA

Kitty Vertigo always draws a Technical Asshattery card when Glen Rock is rolled, even if he is not on the location.

2

Canton, Georgia

MC

While a player is on Canton he may choose to force an opponent to move to Canton rather than roll the location die at the start of his turn. No cards are drawn.

3

Marietta, Georgia

TA

The player moving to Marietta gains 3 assets. Instead of accepting these assets, the player may choose to move to any other location on the board. No additional cards are drawn.

4

San Marcos, California

PL

ZenZagg always draws a Passive Lurkery card when San Marcos is rolled, even if he is not on the location.

5

Alpharetta, Georgia

SM

MC cards played against CR have double the a
sset cost in Alpharetta. Any player losing a MC against CR in Alpharetta automatically loses their next turn in addition to any other consequences they face from the lost MC. It is not possible to lose more than one turn this way.

6

Kennesaw, Georgia

MC

The player moving to Kennesaw gains 3 assets. Instead of accepting these assets, the player may choose to move to any other location on the board. No additional cards are drawn.

7

Woodstock, Georgia

SM

The player moving to Kennesaw gains 3 assets. Instead of accepting these assets, the player may choose to move to any other location on the board. No additional cards are drawn.

8

Norcross, Georgia

TA

While KV is in Norcross, no SM or TA cards can be played against him. Persistent effects still apply. PL and MC cards can be played at half cost against KV while he is in Norcross.

9

Jasper, Georgia

SM

Crossed Reality always draws a Social Manipulation card when Jasper is rolled, even if he is not on the location.

10

Holly Springs, Georgia

PL

The player moving to Kennesaw gains 3 assets. Instead of accepting these assets, the player may choose to move to any other location on the board. No additional cards are drawn.

11

Sandy Springs, Georgia

PL

While ZZ is in Sandy Springs, all PL cards played by him have their cost reduced by 4 to a minimum of 1. Cards with a cost of 0 are not affected. While ZZ is in Sandy Springs, all TA cards played against him have their cost doubled.

12

Atlanta, Georgia

MC

All players draw a Mortal Combat card when Atlanta is rolled, even if they are not on the location.

Example Cards

Slick Tongued
Social Manipulation
Gain two assets.

Slick Tongued
Social Manipulation
Gain two assets.

Not Afraid to Speak Your Mind
Social Manipulation
Gain one asset. All other players must immediately play a card with no asset cost that gives them at least one asset, but that doesn’t target any other player. If a player has no cards of this type, he must discard a card of his choosing from his hand.

Distinct Lack of Awkwardness
Social Manipulation
Gain one asset. If you are in a location that gives Social Manipulation cards, immediately draw a Social Manipulation card.

Temporarily Disarming Charm
Social Manipulation

Play during another player’s turn immediately after a Mortal Combat card is played against you. You gain one asset and the Mortal Combat is canceled. The Mortal Combat card returns to its player’s hand and that player regains any assets spent to play the card. The Mortal Combat card may be played again this turn against another player.

Outthink, Outspeak, Win
Social Manipulation
This card costs two assets.

Target player loses four assets.

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