A series of short plays.

Picasso gets married to a large grizzly bear in ‘Please Don’t Rub Your Back On My Peach Tree.’
Picasso enters, places his hat on a hat rack, and sees Yvonnne hibernating on the couch
Picasso: Oh, come on. Baby, we got central heat so you wouldn’t have to do this!
Yvonne: Moaahrns.
Picasso crosses and pokes her with a stick
Picasso: No, bad wife. Bad wife no hibernate!
Yvonne: GROWANWSLS
Picasso: I don’t care how tired you are. Take a nap, don’t fall into a coma. When I married you, you said you could control this.
Yvonne: GRWAWWWWWAAWWLAIAIDLIFJALSDFSSS! Yvonne grabs the top of Picasso’s body stalk, begins gnawing on it while scraping at his eyes.
Picasso: OW! OW! Damnit, remember what the marriage counselor said! HAPPY THOUGHTS! HAPPY THOUGHTS! DON’T MAKE ME GET MR. JINGLES THE HAPPY COMPROMISE SOCK PUPPET!
Yvonne: Roooaoaoeeaaaar!
Fade to black

Kenny faces a world without Dr. Pepper in ‘My Baby Does The Weepy Hanky.’
Kenny: Excuse me, do you have any Dr. Pepper? The shelves seem to be out…
Clerk: They don’t make that anymore, do they? Here, have some V8!
Kenny: Hiss! God no! And of course they still make Dr. Pepper…well, do you have any Mr. Pibb?
Clerk: What the hell is that? Here, have some V8!
Kenny: I’ll claw your damn eyes out, register vegetable.
Clerk: But, but, it’ll really straighten out your day! And it’s the only beverage they’re allowed to make anymore, ever since the Atkins hoard bought all the soft drink companies and turned them into The Collected Museums of Blogs.
Kenny: They’re…they’re all gone? Even Dr. Thunder?
Clerk: …don’t cry….have some V8!
Kenny: HISS! I can’t live in this world!
Clerk: Oh. Bullets are aisle 4. But you don’t want to commit suicide thirsty…have some V8!
Kenny walks off stage. We hear a bang. Clerk falls over dead. 8 more bangs follow, making Clerk twitch. Kenny then walks back on stage and shoots himself in the head.

Graeme and Justin Timberlake get stuck on a desert island in ‘The Boys of Talui Yaka.’
Graeme: Look, I can’t keep talking about this forever. You are NOT a musician. You never even wrote a decent song.
Justin: That’s not true! Besides, I accomplished a lot with that fame. I did a lot of good.
Graeme: Like what?
Justin: Well, I was on the Simpsons. Were you ever on the Simpsons?
Graeme: No…god damnit…but…
Justin: I thought so.
Graeme: You’re a musician! Singing Yvan Et Nioj on a cartoon show, even if it is the cartoon show that’s the source of all life, shouldn’t be the highlight of your career!
Justin: I slept with Britney Spears, how about that?
Graeme: I don’t even think she’s that attractive.
Justin: But everyone else does.
Graeme: So?
Justin: So, no one even knows who you’re girlfriend is!
Graeme: She’s not your girlfriend anymore, now, is she?
Justin: Fine. No one thinks your ex-girlfriends are hot, either.
Graeme: There are more important things. Besides, no one I ever dated tongue wrestled with Madonna.
Justin: …she did that?
Graeme: Yeah. It was all over CNN.
Justin: …well, shit…wait, what about that really disgusting chick that your ex…
Graeme: She wasn’t Madonna , now, was she?
Justin: Fuck, you’re right. Okay, but I still think I had some good songs.
Graeme: Name one.
Justin: …
Graeme: See? I mean, that song the Neptunes wrote was alright, but you can’t really take credit for that, can you?
Justin: I sang it! I danced in the video!
Graeme: I can sing Yesterday. Does that make it mine?
Justin: Well…
Graeme: Yeah, see, you wasted your life.
Justin: …want to turn gay?
Graeme: FOR THE LAST TIME NO.
Narrator walks on stage, lights dim on Graeme and Justin
Narrator: And so it would go for three more months, before Graeme shoved a fully inflated volleyball down Justin’s throat after one particularly heated discussion that went, basically, the exact same as the one above.

Travis and a really full wallet in ‘My Wafuyl Tastes Like Byrning.’
Ryan: Wowiefoshizzle big bro, what the heck is that thing?
Travis: It’s an air gun with enough power to blow a soup-can sized projectile through a small office building! And if I flip this switch, it releases 10,000 watts of electricity through the barrel! And if I do this…
Ryan touches the barrel, spasms, dies.
Travis: NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooo….who’s going to play the built in GameCube with me now?

Unnamed Blob on a small boat in the middle of the dead sea in ‘Liferaft.’
Unnamed Blob: Wow, that looks salty.
Fifteen minutes of silence and blinking
Unnamed Blob: Oh messugah, a small leak…wait….