Don’t touch me there.

Originally, I planned to do a long, drawn out, expositionary feature on Jux’s adventures in PA this spring break. Then I suddenly realized that that sort of thing was mostly interesting only to us, except for a few stories. So, instead of a huge series of features on vaguely interesting events (to you), I’m going to list some of the most interesting things that happened, along with pictures and a few movies. In one feature.

1) Travis and I learned how to play Dance Dance Revolution.
We’d only attempted this particular game once before, in an arcade in Gatlinburg. Well, the second we saw the dance mats on the floor of Kenny’s basement, we knew we’d have to try again. It started off a horrible exercise in awkwardness and ended with us being not-half bad. The game that I had held as nothing short of stupid and impossible for so long is actually insanely fun, and addictive. The very first thing I did once I got back to Georgia was buy DDRMAX2 and an extra dance pad. Do you know how hard it is to get a Jew to spend that kind of money?

Anyway, we took a series of movies while there, which show not only how good Kenny is at it, to how Travis and I progressed from horrible to not-at-all-unpleasing. They are of decent size though, so beware before clicking on the links.

Movie 1: Kenny and Travis
Movie 2: Travis’s early attempts to learn the game result in the invention of the “DK Stomp”
Movie 3: End of the Century is no longer a match for the Georgia Juxers

Of note: The DK Stomp wasn’t the only new step invented while we were there. During a particularly difficult song that even he was no match for, Kenny called me over to go “Track and Field”, where he stomped on the down and right arrows as fast as he could, and I stomped on the up and left. This revealed two things. The first: that is not a viable DDR tactic. The second: playing Track and Field is very hard on your legs.

2) Other things to do with a Dance Pad
Using a keyboard mapping program, we did the following things with the DDR pads: Played Worms 2 and Worms World Party, drew a pretty picture, and caused random things to happen in Windows.

3) Dragon Dice
Who would have thought a decade old dice game would still be this much fun? Even better, it resulted in an argument over rulings that reminded me of the real reason we all got the internet in the Magic era: ERRATA! I still maintain that I am right.

What, you’re surprised?

4) Mario Party
Kenny is crazy at these games, and steals my stars. No matter where I hide them on Daisy’s lithe, nubile, succulent body, he finds them and takes them from me. Keeping a Boo under my dress didn’t help.

5) Old Friends
Most of what went down is funny only to us, I’m sure. (Or only me, in the case of the woman who recoiled her child in fear of us.) We’re old friends who hadn’t actually seen each other in a long, long time. And yet, there was no adjustment period. It was as if he left Georgia yesterday.

To sum up our trip, I’m including some of the pictures I took, all of which will eventually be availible in the Information section’s photo gallery, when I’m done making that over. Tomorrow, or maybe later tonight, Jux will return to normal with a Picasso feature.

The sandwich man!

Camera faces.

Travis is about to get his ass kicked by Kenny’s brother Kyle.

Kenny’s cat Casper, in the coolest picture I’ve ever taken of an animal. Other than resizing, it has not been photoshopped in any way…that’s just the flash of the camera. Scary, isn’t it?

Kenny’s head made that hole in the basement’s ceiling.

According to Kenny, his Power Pad to Dance Pad conversion is a hell of a lot better than the shit you get from Mad Catz. I believe him. Plus, it looks a hell of a lot cooler.

A lip, ripe for the picking.

A timer camera, all of us, a Kenny brother (Kurtis, this time), and a comfy couch.

Casper’s got it!

Not anymore.

Now it’s down there.

Couch fishing.

Looks like Kenny’s caught something.